LEE PITS GIFTS

LEE PITTS

GIFTS TO THE AUTHOR

“MY HOUSE RUNNETH OVER”

An abstract from a Lee Pitts article from the November 20, 2018,

Delmarva Farmer new's paper out of Easton Maryland for the Mid-

Atlantic farmers.

He says there are many benefits to being a syndicated columnist and an author although the pay is a 'pittance' the gifts you get more than make up the difference.

Once he wrote about his barb wire collection and a long time reader in South Dakota sent his his entire barb wire collection and another reader in Nebraska sent a three foot windmill made from barb wire.

At home he says he has very little room for the books people have sent because the bookshelves are full of a miniature anvil collection.

The Renaissance Magazine ran a few of my columns and paid me

off with a 1957 red Chevy Bel Air convertible but it was only three inches

long. I have collections of everything, knife, spurs, bits, hats, bullet,

pencil, art and clocks. In the branding arm collection I have one that

folds from Will & Debb, Bob sent a mniature with my name, Range

Magazine gave me a bigger golden version with my brand that is cherished even if it is not pure gold.. Skinner gave a cutting board

from the wood from his own ranch, EC sent 40 years of date books so I

can tell where to be and when. Butch sent several “blabs” for that

collection . A blab prevents a calf from sucking. The Red Bluff

Bull Sale gang sent me a bridal, reins and Garcia bit. John has

sent a art piece of a pencil drawing of the stages a pony goes through

to become a cow horse that will become of value when we are both dead.

Mad Jack cartoons created a a shrine of eight for me. Western States

Beefmaster folks a plaque with clock, Brangues Association a Cross

pen and pencil set and Bubba of the Akaushi Association sent great

tasting steaks .

People who think I am skinny and need to fatten up send

every food from Almonds to Zucchini. Also people who watch how I

dress , try to dress me. I have a lifetime supply of caps and jackets and

several Pendleton shirts and a Mark Dahl belt buckle. There is the

Certified Angus Beef jacket and the Charolais shirt that I take care not to

were to an Angus sale or vice versa.

Lee has been thinking of starting a “ registration service”, like new weds have, only for writers. That way you would know we need a 72”

TV and satellite dish a whole lot more that a silver chafing dish.

It perhaps would put an end to the odd gifts received, like the

box of “flies” one time. No they were not the kind for fishing.

Nor were they from an irate reader.

These flies were from a company that sells “castrated” male

flies to help decrease the fly population Can you imagine how small

the callicrate banders must be for them. A bander is the tool used

to “ cut 'em off “ .

The flies gift was fleeting because they were turned loose

and never heard from again.

Source: Lee Pitts, November 20, 2018, Delmarva Farmer Magazine